Archive for the ‘DSMB’ Category

Post Party Depression

January 14, 2007

From the DSMB:
In social gatherings I am often mistaken for an extrovert. The truth is when I’m being that friendly and engaging, my brain is running on overdrive. I’m constantly working the room in my head, planning my next line of conversation, and evaluating how my last joke was received. It’s utterly exhausting. Usually by the end of the night I’m no longer able to keep up the performance, and the mumblings and missteps start to pile up until I’m convinced I’ve blown my cover. “Post Party Depression” is the time I spend afterwards trying to figure out what I did wrong, and what the damage will be.

Until recently, I’ve tried to keep this condition secret. I don’t think it makes me more likable to reveal that I obsess about appearing likable. But after confessing to a few friends, it turns out lots of people do the same thing. As with any disorder, it’s nice to know you aren’t alone. PPD-Sufferers unite!

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Perfanxionism

January 9, 2007

Excerpt from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Brendan’s Disorders (DSMB-1 2007):

Etiology
Little is known about the causes of Perfanxionism, but research has shown that outbreaks occur during periods of high ambition coupled with low confidence.

Symptoms
Symptoms include spending an entire Monday evening creating the header image for one’s new blog.

Treatment
Intervention is often difficult, as the disorder can interfere with the objective prioritization of one’s health (food, sleep, etc) against the need to keep working. Therapy typically focusses on the separation of self-worth from the wittiness of a blog post.

Prognosis
A successful project can push symptoms into remission, but perfanxionists are at high risk for relapse. Prognosis depends on the diagnostician’s response.